These new books from Brian Dembowcsyk give mums and dads practical ideas, biblical wisdom, and the encouragement every family needs to make discipleship work at home—no guilt trips, just grace and guidance
Most of us parents know that discipling our children in the faith is primarily our job and that it’s absolutely crucial for the faith lives of our children. But equally most of us are not confident that we know what to do; we don’t feel particularly able or even wouldn’t know where to start.
Of course, our church families can be a great source of wisdom and guidance (please do draw on the experience of those in your church that have gone before you), but it’s also good to grab whatever help is out there in terms of books and online resources.
Beyond in some way reading the Bible, praying and living out the Gospel there is no right or wrong way to disciple your kids in the home
Beyond in some way reading the Bible, praying and living out the Gospel there is no right or wrong way to disciple your kids in the home so not all resources will suit all types of parents and children – that’s OK. Fortunately, there are a range of resources for parents to pick from.
Two books that come as a pair and will be useful to many are Family Discipleship that Works and Faith Foundations by Brian Dembowczyk. Brian is an extremely experienced author and family pastor, and it shows.
If our children are to follow Jesus, then they’ll follow him with their lives as much as their minds
Family Discipleship that Works comes first. It’s Brian’s book about family discipleship, what it is, why it’s important, and how to go about it. He frames the whole thing in the language of the theater (yep, he’s from the USA, so you’ll have to forgive him for the way he spells!). He draws an analogy between faith and drama because although he wants us to think about our children learning about Jesus and believing in him, he also wants to go big on the importance of acting out the faith. If our children are to follow Jesus, then they’ll follow him with their lives as much as their minds. He pulls on a brilliant quote from an American theologian who says we need to think in terms of “crossing the ugly ditch between theory and practice.”
Read more:
Help your children navigate a sexually confusing world with gospel confidence
If your children leave the church, there is hope
Rethinking Christian parenting: The book challenging discipline myths in the Church
Chapters that follow are soaked in Scripture, insightful comments, and amusing stories. Brian has done a great job here. I love the way he doesn’t hold back from giving us real meat to get into but does so with grace and humour. He’s very affirming too. Us parents feel guilty real easy but a real strength of this book is that you feel challenged and equipped without feeling feel got at – now that I like! Brian shows how there has never been a golden era when people were doing it right and whatever else you take from the book he wants us to know that we’ve got this – we have the resources and we have what it takes.
Family Discipleship that Works feels like having an encouraging coach besides you cheering you on which is just great. Faith Foundations on the other hand, feels like a plan for the game that the coach recommends. It’s 99 devotions to help families “know, love and act like Jesus.”
No one should slavishly follow every last bit of what is suggested
It’s based on a question-and-answer format that leads you and your family to dig into the Bible to answer questions like: What does it mean that God is eternal? Where is the Holy Spirit? And, Is there anyone who does not sin? Each question has a Bible verse, a devotion, discussion questions, a prayer and perhaps unsurprisingly given his focus on acting out the faith there is also a family activity to do. It doesn’t feel like it would be very easy to make accessible for preschoolers – though if you’re really creative you might be able to make it work.
Now as with any resource, the best way to use it is not religiously (if you know what I mean!). It’s best to look over it and think about your family and which bits will work best for all concerned. No one should slavishly follow every last bit of what is suggested. In fact, there is so much in what Brian says in both books that if you try to do everything all the time, I’m guessing you’ll be overwhelmed!
On the other hand, if you bring Brian alongside you like a coach who has loads of ideas about technique but also a plan for the game which you are then responsible for using when you’re out on the field, then I’m sure these two books can only help you. Either way my hope is that through taking a step in a journey of family discipleship will be a blessing to you and your family as together you come to know, love and act like Jesus more.
