If you drop into a church hall anywhere in the country during the week you will have a good chance of finding the place filled with the noise of young children playing, while their mothers, grandmothers and childminders drink coffee and chat about the sleeping routines and feeding habits of their youngsters. There may be a few dads scattered around, but the atmosphere in the vast majority of church parent and toddler groups is overwhelmingly feminine. If, on a Saturday morning, you visit one of the 100 plus Who Let The Dads Out? groups running throughout the UK you will find a similar thing going on but with one significant difference. The room will be filled with men. Who Let The Dads Out? is a movement of parent and toddler groups specifically for fathers, father figures and their children.
In 2003, we decided to start Who Let The Dads Out? at our church – Hoole Baptist Church, Chester – because some of the mothers who attended our parent and toddler group had expressed serious concerns about how little the fathers of their children did with them. When we opened the doors for the first Who Let The Dads Out? session on 29th March 2003, I welcomed 20 dads – each accompanied by at least one child – into our building. I knew something significant had happened that morning, but didn’t fully understand what we had begun. I now know that we had been blessed with the privilege of initiating a new movement of outreach to men throughout the UK and beyond.
Our vision for Who Let The Dads Out? is to turn the hearts of fathers to their children and the hearts of children to their fathers (Malachi 4:6), to make ready a people prepared for the Lord (Luke 1:17). A Saturday morning group is a catalyst for enabling effective missional outreach those who come along with their children. At Hoole Baptist Church we followed up our Saturday morning sessions with a five-session parenting programme called Daddy Cool! and then a Soul Man? group for the dads to explore basic questions of faith and spirituality. We also launched an after-school group for dads and their older children called School’s Out, Dad’s About (SODA) Club. We encourage other churches to use these resources to deepen the relationships they form with the dads in their groups, and ultimately to be able to invite them to become Christians.
TRUE STORY: DAVE
One of the first dads I welcomed to our group in Chester was Dave, a stay-at-home dad to three sons. I remember he couldn’t quite believe he was seeing so many fathers in one place having fun with their toddler children. He seized the opportunity to go on the Daddy Cool! programme and joined the Soul Man? group too. He also went on an Alpha Course. Now he says he prays about family issues and concerns and he attends church regularly with his family. He invited me to be godfather to one of his sons, and I feel that all the hard work of setting up and running these groups for fathers would still have been worth it, even if only for Dave.
Who Let The Dads Out? is now a core ministry of BRF (Bible Reading Fellowship), the charity behind Messy Church, and all churches are invited to join the growing movement. Please do get in touch with us. We would love to support you in setting up a group.
Five steps to get Who Let The Dads Out ? going in your church
• Check out the website at wholetthedadsout.org. uk, and, through the directory, identify the group that is closest to you. Contact the group leader to ask if you could visit them, to see a group in action.
• Buy the book Who Let The Dads Out? , which gives you plenty of guidance for setting up a group. The follow-on book School’s Out, Dad’s About covers SODA Club, Daddy Cool! and Soul Man? They are both available from brfonline.org.uk
• Gather a team of volunteers. A core team of at least four – to welcome, cook, mix with the dads and lead the craft activity – is useful.
• Make sure the parent and toddler group leaders at your church are willing to share their toys and resources, and are committed to helping you promote the Who Let The Dads Out? group.
• Set a date for your first session, advertise it and pray. Share with us how your first session goes on the Facebook group (search for Who Let The Dads Out?).