What’s your parenting style? Are you a helicopter or a satellite parent?

You have probably heard of helicopter parenting - the idea that parents hover over every move their children make, ready to swoop in and protect them from harm. This style has been made even more possible by smartphones: I can see where my children are at any moment. Is he going to get home in time for dinner? Why is she in the park when she should be at dance class? I just want to check that they both made it home from school.

This style of parenting is well documented, and it’s quite a provocative and pointed term—no one wants to be a helicopter parent, and we can all think of others who seem to fall into this trap. The neurosis that comes from the anxiety of wanting the best for our children often leads us to prevent them from having any genuine freedom—even the freedom to come to limited harm. I can see this in my own heart. I remember standing over my toddlers, hyper-aware of any hard edge they might fall on and hurt themselves. There’s a good kind of risk awareness and a natural desire to protect our children.

Of course, we want to protect our children—I cannot imagine the horror of living with a preventable tragedy or an avoidable accident. And with our 24-hour news cycle, such concerns are hard to ignore. We’re constantly reminded of what could happen through the catastrophes that befall others. But we also need to prepare our children—prepare them for when we are no longer there to hover over them, for when they need to grow wings and fly on their own. Prepare them for a time when they won’t need our protection anymore.