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How often do you argue? What effect does that have on you? Do your disagreements tend to escalate or de-escalate? Do you still have bitterness or unforgiveness from previous arguments? Could your listening skills help with any of this? How well do you listen to people in everyday life?

Spend a good amount of time on these questions then brainstorm with your mentee the main outcomes of poor listening (eg misunderstanding, errors, hurt feelings, damaged relationships) and then flip it to identify what good, active listening can achieve for you too.



Poor listening






Active listening





What does bad listening do in the following situations (try to identify a real example for each)?:

•Discussing politics or other emotive subjects…

•Arguing with your parents…

•When your teacher is giving you instructions…

•When your friend is opening up to you about a personal issue..


Chat about:

•Is there a spiritual element to this?

•How do the principles of active listening relate to ‘listening’ to the voice of God?

•How does all this relate to Mark 12:31: “Love your neighbour as yourself?” (For example, active listening can be a powerful way to show love and care for others.)

•How can you work on your active listening skills (as a spiritual act of worship) in the coming week?


Supporting documents

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