Despite a good start, school had turned into a place of academic average-ness and occasional bullying, so the opportunity of a fresh social start was attractive. I wasn't sure about the faith aspect, but I was desperate for a place to belong. I agreed to try it.
Five years later, I left the group a very different person. Now with a strong network of friends, I'd had my self-confidence rebuilt. The dreams I'd once had as a boy, then put away in my early teens, were back. I'd found my place of belonging in that youth group - FT they called it, though no one quite new why - and I'd flourished. And of course, I'd found something else too.
Last month, thanks to the joy of Facebook, someone got the old FT gang back together. Reassembled from all corners of the UK, 19 of us gathered in a curry house round the corner from that old church for a 20-year reunion. Our lives look very different now; marriages, children, jobs and house moves (and in my case a significantly healthier diet) have all done their bit to change and develop us. But perhaps extraordinarily, one thing remained the same. Every single person around that table is still in church 20 years later. Still Christian, after all these years.
"Every single person around that table is still in church 20 years later. Still Christian, after all these years."
That shouldn't be extraordinary; God is real, after all. Yet we all know that this gathering bucks the trend; many, many young people lose their grip on faith when they enter the 'real world' of work or university. Which forces me to ask - what was it that the leaders of FT got so right?
I spent much of the evening asking my old friends that question. We all agreed that FT had been an incredible place of community, safety, and belonging. Let's be honest though, most half-decent church youth groups tick those boxes; they don't always create a crucible for lasting faith development. No, here's the simple, devastatingly unoriginal thing which the leaders of FT got right, and which produced a perfect score on faith retention 20 years later: they discipled us.
Even then it was counter-cultural. They invited teenagers to make God the most important priority in their busy lives. The leaders gave up their Friday nights to ensure we had to choose between FT and teenage drinking (we never mixed the two, honest). They gave up even more time to meet with us one-to-one and when they did so, we always opened the Bible. We were always aware of the journey we were on, and aware that there was a destination in mind: some level of spiritual maturity.
"They gave up time to meet with us one-to-one and when they did so, we always opened the Bible." - @martinsaunders
Like many others around the table, I departed the Church for a little while for a prodigal period (although mine was a crushingly unexciting version), but the faith I’d been brought up in was strong enough to overcome it. I always knew God was real through that period because I knew God. And I knew him because the humble, generous leaders of that youth group had repeatedly led me to him. They weren’t high priests through whom I experienced spirituality by proxy; they introduced me to the living God, then got out of the way. The result: lasting faith.
FT wasn’t a particularly ‘conservative’ (theologically-speaking) youth group. It did however place great emphasis on the importance of the Bible. We were encouraged to read it at home and together. The leaders had an infectious passion for the wisdom contained within it and their example made us want to read for ourselves. Scripture sticks. It’s hard to lose touch with the word when you’ve hidden it in your heart.
Time invested, a sense of purpose, a direct relationship with God and a passion for the Bible. There may be other keys to great youth work, but those were the four things that meant the faith of 19 young people lasted the course from teenage years to adulthood.
We used to spend hours trying to work out what ‘FT’ stood for. Fashionable Trousers, Fishers of Trout, Flippant Tarantulas… the leader who thought of the name maintained we’d never guessed correctly. On that 20-year anniversary, he finally revealed the truth behind the acronym: Farty Teenagers. Yes, the fifth and most important key to FT’s success: a relentless sense of fun.
There’s no one-size-fits-all formula for successful youth ministry. But if that evening taught me anything, it’s that good youth workers aren’t afraid to disciple their teenagers – to call them to the narrow path and have high expectations of them. Sometimes I can feel quite afraid of that kind of challenge, yet perhaps it’s entirely what young people need. As many have said before me, perhaps young people reject Christianity not because we’ve made it too difficult, but because we’ve made it too easy. FT wasn’t easy, but it was a call to a counter-cultural life that 19 of us found – and continue to find – irresistible.
"Perhaps young people reject Christianity not because we've made it too difficult but because we've made it too easy"