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BACKGROUND PREPARATION
Prepare the slide show for What are they on about? and gather the materials for ‘Preparation point’.
RITUAL: PIZZA
WHAT ARE THEY ON ABOUT ?
10 mins
The aim of this game is to get young people thinking about the importance of context. Make a slide show of quotes from movies (or download the one we made). In groups, challenge the young people to write down what they think is being talked about in the quote. Give points for correct answers, and bonus points for particularly hilarious and creative answers as well.
BEYOND THE BINARY
10 mins
Say: in the activity we’ve just done, the meaning we took from a quote could totally change based on the context in which it was said. Context is also important when it comes to sex. We’re going to have a think now about the different contexts in which we experience sex and sexuality and whether these are healthy or unhealthy contexts for sex.
Prepare a list of contexts in which sexual activity occurs (e.g. marriage, one night stands, friends with benefits, movies, adverts, before the age of consent, porn, masturbation, mutual masturbation, internet hook-ups, Skype, drunk etc.). Ensure that you are clear what these terms refer to, as you may need to explain some of the terms to the young people.
Read out the items on your list one-by-one. As you do this the young people must move to the left wall if they think it’s a healthy context for sex or the right wall if they think it’s an unhealthy context for sex. Try to get some feedback about why they have answered the way they have.
Say: it seems like there’s a whole lot of sex going on in our world - in lots of different contexts. We’ve thought about which of these contexts are healthy and which are unhealthy. Last week we thought about the fact that Jesus was a sexual being and had his own sexual script. Today we’re going to look at some of what he had to say about healthy contexts for sex.
BIBLE PASSAGE
15 mins
Read Matthew 19:3-6 and explain the context of the passage - religious leaders were always trying to catch Jesus out on tricky issues. Jesus is asked about divorce specifically, but he changes the conversation around to look at broader issues of sexuality and marriage. After you’ve done this, ask the group to discuss these questions:
• From this passage, what do you think Jesus thought was a healthy context for sex?
• Why do you think he thought this?
• How much do you agree with him on this?
• If he’s right, what differences would and should it make to the way you engage with your life, sexuality and with culture?
PREPARATION POINTS
10 mins
Provide two small pieces of wood for each young person, along with some strong adhesive and some marker pens. Explain to the group that if you wanted to glue two pieces of wood together permanently, you would take time to ensure that the wood was prepared well - sanded, clean and ready. In the same way, before we use sex, the relationship glue, we need to think about what needs to be in place to do this well. Create space for the young people to think about this, while writing their ideas about what should be in place onto the pieces of wood. They can then glue them together, and keep this as a reminder of what the session talked about.
CLOSING REFLECTION
What have you found most helpful during this session? What have you found least helpful?
TAKE AWAY QUESTION
This week, try to notice the different contexts you see sex portrayed in or talked about. How many of them are healthy contexts and how many are unhealthy?
KEY POINTS
Sex is powerful - the Bible talks about sex being the process by which two ‘become one flesh’; the process by which they are joined together in a way that you can’t tell where one ends and the other begins. Sex is powerful relationship glue; it joins two people together with an incredibly strong bond. That’s why when sexual relationships end, it’s often extremely painful emotionally for both parties. This is what Jesus is talking about in the passage we’ve read. He says that God created it to be like this and that’s why he also showed that the best and safest context for sex is a committed, monogamous relationship.
You might like to illustrate the strength of this bond by using a quick drying strong adhesive such as No More Nails to stick two pieces of wood together. Then give the young people a chance to try to separate them by force. It should be difficult to separate the wood and if it does separate it should leave bits behind, even if those parts are only small. In the same way, a sexual bond should be hard to break, but if it does break, it may well be painful and hurt us.
Brand new Romance Academy playing cards are out now.
The cards are 52 ways to start the conversation with questions about values, choices, dilemmas and sexual health. Find them in the Romance Academy online shop.
Supporting documents
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