8 steps to address generational trauma

Thomas really wanted to help make breakfast. He was 4 and I was just plain tired. I had been up all night with the baby and had just about enough energy to feed him. Whilst my back was turned, he picked up the milk carton and proceeded to pour its contents all over the counter and onto the floor! A scream left my mouth, and my hand went up to hit him. Before my hand connected with his body, I froze and thought “you’re just like dad.” Suddenly, flashbacks of my own childhood flooded my mind, and I remember thinking that this was not what I wanted for my own children. I saw how much of my parenting was inherited, not chosen. And with that awareness came a powerful truth. What’s passed down can also be transformed.

What’s passed down can also be transformed

Research shows we often parent as we were parented, a concept called intergenerational transmission. Studies by Bowlby, Ainsworth, Bandura and others, alongside neuroscience and ACEs research, reveal that trauma can lead to harmful patterns, while warmth and responsiveness are often repeated. Understanding this helps us break cycles and build healthier relationships with our children.

Is there hope for Thomas and others like him? Absolutely. God can ……