Matt Wan from Cross Connecting believes placing prayer, wisdom and grace at the centre is the key to Christian parents engaging with schools
What should I do if my child’s school isn’t supportive of our family’s Christian faith?
How do I respond when topics are taught that seem to go against Biblical truth?
In our previous article, we explored how to equip our children to navigate a secular school environment with confidence, grace, and discernment.
But what about the school itself? When confronted with the reality that our children might be coming into contact with ideas that seem to go against our family’s Christian faith, should I seriously consider homeschooling? Or are there ways to engage meaningfully and positively with school, even when challenges arise? Can we be present in a way that is impactful and lays the groundwork for change, while remaining gracious and relational? Is it possible to support our children’s spiritual journey within the school setting, without feeling that withdrawal is the only faithful option?”
I believe the answer is a resounding yes. Let’s turn to Scripture.
Read more:
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What should Christian parents think about phone use in schools - Is a ban the answer?
Your child and their school: 4 ways Christian parents can raise faithful children in a secular school
What Christian parents should know about the new sex and relationships education guidance
In Colossians 4:3–6, Paul writes:
“And pray for us, too, that God may open a door for our message, so that we may proclaim the mystery of Christ… Pray that I would proclaim it clearly, as I should. Be wise in the way you act toward outsiders; make the most of every opportunity. Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone.”
Notice that Paul doesn’t urge his readers to withdraw. Instead, his heart is for followers of Jesus to be fully present in the world, knowing that it will make a positive impact for God’s Kingdom. And Paul offers not only a call to engage with those outside the faith, but also a blueprint for how to do so, which impacts the way we can and should think about the schools our children are at.
These three principles — prayer, wisdom, and grace — lay the foundation for how we can engage with our children’s schools
Firstly, he prays — asking God for open doors and opportunities to speak. If we want to have a meaningful impact on our children’s schools, we must begin with prayer. Pray for wisdom, for favour, and for the right moments to speak.
Secondly, Paul urges us to act with wisdom. Engagement doesn’t mean rushing in; it means discerning the right time, the right person, the right opportunities, and sometimes even recognising when someone else might be better placed to speak. Wisdom is key.
Finally, Paul reminds us to speak with grace. In a culture that often encourages combative responses, Paul’s words are a gentle but powerful challenge: let your words be gracious and seasoned with salt. This isn’t about winning arguments — it’s about winning hearts and minds.
By showing up, praying faithfully, building relationships, and speaking with grace, you become a quiet but powerful witness to the love of Christ
These three principles — prayer, wisdom, and grace — lay the foundation for how we can engage with our children’s schools. Here are five practical ways to put them into action:
1. Pray for Your School
Is there a parent prayer group you could join? If not, could you start one — even with just one or two others? God often uses these small gatherings to open doors for meaningful engagement. Even better, consider connecting with Christian teachers in the school. Ask if they’d be willing to share prayer needs or join you in praying for the school community.
2. Be Present
Schools regularly invite parents to get involved — whether through charity events, classroom help, or even governance roles. You don’t need to do everything, but showing up matters. Your presence communicates care, commitment, and a desire to bless the school, not just critique it.
3. Build Relationships
Are there specific staff members you should intentionally get to know? Whether a teacher whose lessons raise concerns in your mind, or a Christian staff member who’s respected within the school? Relationships take time, but they create the trust needed for meaningful conversations later on, whichever way they go.
4. Communicate with Grace
When the time comes to raise concerns or ask questions, do so with grace, gentleness, and clarity. Aim for conversations that leave the other person feeling valued, respected, and understood — even if you disagree. Let your words reflect Christ’s love and your genuine desire for the children’s best interests.
5. Offer Help and Input
Can you offer support — or connect the school with someone who can? Perhaps your church’s children’s worker could help with RE lessons or assemblies. Offering solutions, not just concerns, shows that you’re invested in the school’s future flourishing and not just to raise a concern or complaint.
Engaging with your child’s school as a Christian parent isn’t always easy — but it is definitely worthwhile. You don’t need to be loud to be heard, or forceful to be faithful. And for the majority of us who feel called to remain engaged rather than withdraw, there is way forward. By showing up, praying faithfully, building relationships, and speaking with grace, you become a quiet but powerful witness to the love of Christ. The positive impact won’t just benefit your children, but for others too in their classrooms too. So take heart! Your presence matters. Your prayers matter. And your voice, when seasoned with wisdom and grace, can open doors you never imagined.
